Lift heavy things for bone health

By » Sun, March 11 2012
2225888987 353cdff2a2 450x407 Lift heavy things for bone health

It's cheaper not to have to use screws. (img by Bruce Thomson)

See that x-ray up there? I have no idea how the person in the photo did it, but I’m pretty sure he wasn’t trying to kick down a banana tree. I’ll get to that in a second.

Did you know that your body builds and rebuilds itself constantly in response to the things you do every day? If you spend lots of time picking up heavy stuff, your body gets better at picking up heavy stuff by directing more energy and resources to building muscles, connective tissue, and bones. If you spend lots of time sitting in front of a laptop computer blogging pictures of soldiers with pixie wings, your body will get better at sitting around hunched over a keyboard.

Keyboard human optimization will no doubt win you fame and increase your chances of reproduction when you tell everyone at the local coffee shop that you only drink coffee that jungle cats have already eaten and shit out because you make zillions of dollars writing for Die < Less. But if you can’t even make it to the coffee shop due to brittle bones, what have you got?

So how can you turn into a tree-felling maniac with shin bones as dense as uranium? (I’m not kidding. Watch this:


Simple strength training will keep your body building your bones, even when you’re old. Don’t like NatNews? How ’bout NPR, who say the same thing?

Note: to start with, walking and stuff is fine. But a good rule of thumb for optimal bone-density strength training (and, incidentally, for strength training in general), is that if you can barely do 6 repetitions of a movement, you’ve got enough weight to stimulate your body’s “build shit” mechanisms.

Then you can kick things for 20 years until you’re up to felling trees (yes, it takes years to develop bones dense enough to kick things like trees without worry about snapping shins). Green activists will likely be too scared of you to protest much. Besides, their Priuses and wind farms are bullshit anyway.

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